Mobility

God has had me on quite the journey for the last year.  I've always loved to travel and the idea of a mobile life, but this is not the dream I had in mind for my life.  I am no longer living in Elkhorn, Nebraska.  I sold my home and found myself living with my sister and her family for a while, then in a duplex/rental with 3 other girls, then with my sister again after surgery, and now back in the duplex.  In the meantime, I bought another home in north Omaha.  It needs some work, which takes much longer than I'd anticipated.

How did I get to this point in my life?  I ask myself this and can't help but chuckle.  When I say, "God spoke to me" or "I felt God prompting/leading me to do something," I'm not talking about an audible voice.  I'm referring to that deep, personal conviction or prompting.  How do I know it comes from God?  A couple reasons come to mind:

1)  It's strong and convincing....I recognize it as a familiar-ness (new word of the day).

2)  It typically doesn't initially line up with my idea of fun....hardly ever.  

3)  When I ask God in prayer to show me what He really wants from me, random/coincidental comments/events confirming God's plan for me are revealed by people or things that take my breath away.

Why would God ask something of me that I don't want to do?  Or go somewhere I don't want to go?  Live in north Omaha???  A predominantly black neighborhood laden with crime and poverty?  God did you forget I'm a single, white female with some messed up knees?  I couldn't run if I wanted to right now!  I worked hard to get through school, so I could have a nice home and nice things....not so I could give up my securities and comforts and move to north O!

Seriously....

Jeremiah 29:11
"For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord.  "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope."

Psalm 37:4
Take delight in the Lord and He will give you your heart's desires.

Remember I said that God's plans for my life typically don't line up with my ideas, at least initially?  That's probably because my desires weren't aligned with His.  Funny, when you pray for God to line your heart up with His heart, your desires tend to change....at least they did for me.  It took about of year of me asking Him to use my life for something that would make a difference in this broken, messed up world, and a year of me begging Him to please not ask me to move to north Omaha.  

Suddenly, like flipping on a light switch....it's bright and painful for a moment.  Your eyes take time to adjust, but suddenly you can see!  In that moment, when things become clear because of the light, you know what you need to do.  The fear to move dissipates as the room is exposed.  The steps to take in order to get from point A to point B are obvious and tangible.  Instead of paralysis, there is excitement in the confidence that you can visualize the task at hand, knowing the path is bright.

Remember too, I mentioned God's voice being familiar?  He doesn't always 'speak' to me in the same ways, but He definitely assures me it's Him each time.  It's the same deep sense of 'knowing' that comes from taking leaps with Him in the past....purely in faith....faith that He would guide me, praying He would heal me,  trusting He would fulfill me somehow in life where it seemed impossible.  'Knowing' He's given me this amazing life to live in spite of my failures and weaknesses....this grace He gives me each day gives me even more hope for me future.